Susan Jeffers wrote the popular book, Feel the Fear an Do it Anyway. While I haven’t actually read it, I did check out her website in an effort to face a real fear of mine – my website. I've been coaching for seven years, but had others design, redesign and maintain my website. When it comes to technical stuff, I blocked my mind to investigation. I've recruited family members. I traded out – coaching for technical assistance. I've tried to hire people. All have served me fairly well, but here I am, seven years later with a website in need of a face lift and no ability to move forward with that on my own. My brother, Jeff Ganssle had designed the original website for his company and was happy to help me get started. I wrote content, picked out colors and pictures. Jeff went to work and the big day finally arrived and we 'went live'. Jeff then attempted to teach me how to work on the back side it and I totally blanked out. I didn’t want to learn about that – I wanted to just have the darn thing be up there and for people to be able to find me on the internet. I wanted to be a coach, not a computer geek! I just couldn't do it! Everything Jeff said went in one ear and right out the other. Then my good friend Bob from Arp,Texas worked on it for a while. I did pay him but I really wanted a new design, and was ready for a professional. Over the next two or three years, I traded with two Web designers, who gave me a great new look and added some sorely-needed pages. I explained that I wanted to learn how to manage things myself. My first one tried to teach me, but the fear continued to block any forward movement. I did make progress however; I maintain this blog which resides on my website. I’m not a total dummy! I found a second professional who needed a coach but it was much more “easy-peasy” for her to just fix my site, rather than to teach me. Earlier this year, I found a local who was happy to take my $50 deposit but has done nothing to help or teach me. I asked for my money back but I guess that’s an investment in learning not to trust everyone. Another friend suggested that I look at local colleges and find a hungry student who may want some extra cash and a willing student. It’s a thought, and I may still check into that. What prompted this whole blog was my discovery of a book that I purchased who-know-how-long-ago; “WorldPress for Dummies”. It’s dusty. I’ve never opened it. Just looking at it filled my heart with fear. This is silly – I’m a sixty-two year old woman with reasonable intelligence and learning capability. I moved it from the book shelf to right next to my computer – the yellow and black cover begging me to just open to the first page. Go ahead, Gerri. You can do it! Susan Jeffers says, “The only way to get rid of the fear of doing something is to go out and…do it!" I did it. I opened the book. But as I began reading, I am finding that it is indeed in English, not Greek. Susan also says, “Pushing through fear is less frightening than living with the bigger underlying fear that comes from a feeling of helplessness!” I am just tired of feeling helpless. I just finished another John Grisham novel. I have nothing on hand to read but this WordPress for Dummies book. Today is the day; I’m going to face my fear and do it anyway. I’m going to learn how to manage my own website. I’m going to feel the fear and do it anyway! Maybe my next blog will be unveiling the new look! Well, maybe that blog might be down the road a ways, but on this rainy Thursday morning, I'm going to feel my fear and see if I can do this. Stay tuned!